Growing up, we notice several changes in ourselves. Children may grow up into either introverts or extroverts & nothing can be predicted accurately before time. Things change when things change & so do their relationships with people around them. But one question that may haunt is – how to make friends in high school?
Because, during high school, teens happen to face a common challenge of making new friends. Whether amongst introverts or extroverts, this struggle is everywhere! Let’s dive into a list of ways making friends in high school stops looking like a struggle!
How to make new friends in high school?
Making new friends can seem particularly time-consuming, exhausting, and even so much as an anxiety trigger for many. Well, if you are a teen looking to befriend somebody in your high school, things will surely become much easier for you with the tips below!
Here is a list of 8 easy tips that guarantee to ease your process of making new friends in high school:
1. Be easy to approach
If you always have a hard time making new friends in general, it may be an issue that the correct body language can solve. Below are a few ways to be more approachable, which you can keep in mind while trying to make friends – & otherwise as well:
- Spread a smile across your face. Not to overdo it, but it’s still better than frowning in any case.
- Be more open to access. Being on your phone constantly or lost in a book can give the signal that people are invading your personal space or taking up your ‘me-time.’ Keep your phone in your pocket, put aside the book & be more open to real-life communication.
- Don’t be nervous on the nose. Understandably, some typical nervous habits may boil up from within you, but you can always try to actively not indulge in the nervous habits you may unconsciously indulge in, like fidgeting too much, touching your face, playing with your hair, or fidgeting with objects in your hand constantly.
- Maintain eye contact during a conversation. Keeping your head up & looking a person in the eye during a conversation, along with nodding your head to denote attention, can go a long way. It is easy to feel more connected & engaged in a conversation when these little things are taken care of.
2. Break the ice
Taking the lead & initiating a conversation with a new person is essential but also a dreaded step for many, isn’t it? However, there isn’t much left to dread once you realize that, in high school, everybody around you is most likely to accept your invitation to a conversation without a question. Most students are willing to talk, get to know a new person, befriend a classmate, & bond.
If you have social anxiety, it might help to remind yourself of how you are not alone in this. All students are experiencing high school with you & like you. Your worries are other students’ worries as well. Others would likely like to ease the tension just as much as you would like to. In that case, taking the initiative to start a conversation with somebody in your class is a great idea.
Below are listed a few good conversation starters for you to use the next time you decide to approach a classmate for the first time:
- What subject do you love to study?
- What clubs are you a part of? Tell me more about these clubs.
- Do you happen to take any language or art classes?
- What kind of music do you listen to?
- Are you working at any job yet? If so, where?
- What is your most cherished part about being in school?
- How has your school life been so far?
- What are you the most passionate about?
- Do you have a bucket list? What’s on it?
- What is your neighborhood like?
- Are your parents strict?
- Who are your close friends?
- How do you like spending your time outdoors?
- Which sports teams do you like?
3. Remember names
Now, this one may seem like too little a concern but can make a lot of difference. People tend to like hearing the sound of their name when called. If you are somebody who never pays attention, you will most likely not remember somebody’s name & will, thus, find it difficult to connect with them on a deeper level thereby. Well, remembering someone’s name during a conversation isn’t much of a task!
Here are a few tips for you to be able to remember names easily:
- For starters, do not mention that you’re bad at names.
- When a person tells you their name, say it back to them once to make this easy for you.
- Before parting ways with them after the conversation, remember to repeat their name just once again for you to register it perfectly well.
- In case you do not remember someone’s name, own up to it & let them help you with it again. It’s no big deal as long as you own up to it!
4. Speak to the ones that haven’t spoken yet
If you’re one of the extroverted people in your class & wish to connect with new people, it might as well be the introverts you may have not had the opportunity to speak to yet. Introverts can be excellent listeners.
They are likely to be deep thinkers, thereby making way for great conversations. Being detailed observers, introverts can open a different & new world to you. Allow them to become a part of your space as they can. To do this, you can keep in mind the following:
- Do not try to intimidate them. Be easy-going &, preferably, start with light-hearted conversations.
- Let them talk about what they like talking about, & listen to connect with them.
- Be mindful of their personal space & do not be overtly invasive of it.
5. Ask good questions
Asking good questions is one of the simplest ways to get to know a new person. Making a new friend can become a great deal easier with this one technique! However, you need to be mindful of the quality of questions you ask a new friend since you do not entirely know them yet.
The wrong kind of questions can ruin a budding friendship. The best questions to go for are the ones that help you learn about common interests. Here are some questions you can choose to go for:
- Do you have that one song that always puts you in a good mood? If so, what is it & how did you discover it?
- Are you a night owl or are you rather disciplined?
- Does the thought of leaving your phone back home for a day while you are out, bother you?
- What do you think about when you think about your future?
6. Let common interests take the lead
Join a club in your high school or take a class you’d enjoy learning from. It may be a language class, an art class, or maybe you might want to learn a new instrument. This is a guaranteed way to allow you to be amongst those of shared interests.
Communication & connection becomes a whole lot easier with a common interest taking the lead. You get to talk about this interest & participate in it together as you’d like, & there! You make a new friend or, maybe, quite a few!
7. Make them feel important
Appreciation is one of the most basic desires of humans. When someone appreciates one of your good qualities, you instantly tend to like that person for noticing. Similarly, if you are mindful of how you carry a conversation with a new friend, you can actively follow a few simple steps & have them feel like a friend.
- Be a good listener. Pay attention when your friend talks to you. If you have questions or happen to zone out, be vocal about it all. Let them know that you’re interested & invested in what they’re saying.
- Use their name as you speak to them. As we discussed earlier, remembering & using a person’s name during a conversation with them can make a lot of difference. Do not underestimate what it can do for your friendship!
- Be genuinely interested in them. If they share exciting news with you, be sure to follow up. If they need some help, be of help as you can. Let them share & be welcoming.
8. Be yourself
If being yourself means not getting to know a certain few people, not being in the inner circle of some other few, or not feeling involved, you still need not refrain from being yourself. Even though you’re trying to make new friends, your friendships must be based on genuine liking & understanding of two people.
Setting up a pretense just to get somebody to like you is never advisable & does not lead to healthy or long-term friendships. It is important to be who you are at all times, without exceptions! You need not force a friendship with somebody who does not appreciate contacting you or responding to you when necessary.
If you’re the only one putting in all the effort all the time in forming a friendship, whatever you will end up forming will most likely not look like a healthy friendship between two people. So, it is best to be open to people who are open to the real you!
High school friendships can bloom into wonderful enriching experiences in your life. So, do not hold back from forming new bonds & going all out with it! And if you ever wonder – how to make friends in high school, then quickly refer to this article yet again!